Scared.

The future scares the shit out of me
Someone just knocked the spit out of me.
I’m sitting without balance, with nothing but fear
I don’t know my path, wherever I’m near
Is not close enough to where I wanna go.
The sacrifice is clear, but I don’t really know.

Play better.

I am really damn competitive

When it comes to games, I just cant give

in to temptation, I have to fight

Even though its wrong, it feels so right.

I am a fucking addict and it really hurts

I love poker and Mario kart, but it comes in spurts

I’m mad when I lose, and proud when I win

And when I lose, my world starts to spin

What did I do wrong and how did I fail

I set myself up on this messed up trail

I need to learn how to play poker better.

I also need to learn how to live my life better.

Decisions, decisions.

Sometimes you feel bad

Cuz something you want cant be had

Like two cool events on the same night

Or the thrill of doing wrong when you're really doing right

I wish these choices didn't present

But decisions come, just like the rent

check needs to be paid and decisions need to be made

Damn I wish I didn't have to choose

I wish there wasn't always a win and a lose. 

Warmth

The thing about cold is really the fear.
That when you venture out into it, heat won't be near
The real question is how far you should go
The direction might be clear but you don't really know
Whether it is a path of resistance or you can go with the flow
The real hard part is leaving your home
Where you know there is warmth and you'll never be alone
But you don't grow in a place where you're warm
Your character doesn't build, your heart doesn't form
Every little thing is normal and nice
Which is part of the reason I can't face the ice
But when you walk out further than before
You push your own limits, expect a little more
I guess this is why I'm afraid of next year
I'm confronted with a choice of the warmth or the fear
The people who love me, the people who care
Want to take me from my comfort zone and see how I fare
Abroad - without all my family and friends
Its not too far, and to me the ends
Justify the means of pushing the envelope
And like I've been taught, I will widen my scope
To learn about culture and people and life
So I'm gonna do it, and cause myself some strife
Broaden my horizons and take advantage of college
Wish me luck, I'm gonna gain some knowledge.

Chillin with Suj - Written Oct 6th

Yesterday I had a really good talk

With a guy I sometimes wish I could mock

He’s a dancer, he’s crazy, he can pop, lock and drop

His look is pulled straight out of hip hop

But looks shouldn’t really matter much

Its all about the knowledge, intelligence you can’t touch

We talked about SPOP and life

Decisions to make that were causing us strife

How do we go about it, what do we do?

I got a lot to think about after talking with Jason Su

I’m gonna start thinking and stop this rhyme

I hope we can staff together sometime.

Club Kollas - Clubbing Last Week

I am in class once again
With another tale to tell of when
My roommates and I went clubbing last night
And Anes increased three inches in height
Cuz of heels which were part of the look
It was a Thursday night and we said screw the books
This is week 1 - let's have some fun.
So the four of us, with Kevin in shotgun
Head to Lakeforest, Club Kollas it was called
Free before 10, so our asses we hauled
To get there, and stand in the line
As we were walking, my spmama I would find
And quite a lot of other mutual friends.
We had a lot of fun, it was a really good time
Stepped out of our comfort zone, not chill in Irvyne
This was the beginning of a new school year
Hopefully 3rd year will be just as dear.

Chillin in Stats

Probability, variables, expectations, stats

Its all the same math but its wearing different hats

And trying to remind us of the past year

But I thought 3^rd year meant changing gears

To harder, better, faster, stronger

I can’t take this review any longer

Give me just one interesting class

Teach me something, I just need to pass

My days by with service and school

Show me an exception cuz boredom is the rule

Right now, but it will get hard

I can take the challenge – screw the drop card

Cuz I’m ready to learn and have some fun.

I’ll start taking notes – this rap is done.